💯. This is so spot on. I actually was talking about this phenomenon with my partner last night (about how women are conditioned to put others first, to nurture, to fulfill roles based on relative relationships to others in their lives—and from an early age (think playing with dolls and pretending to be a mommy, or playing school house and pretending to teach…) whereas boys are largely conditioned to focus on themselves and achieving their goals. This cultural conditioning leads many women to make compromises in relationships that their partners aren’t even aware of (like taking owndership and management of the bulk of the domestic labor, even if they also have a job outside the home) while men mostly
Just focus on earning money and achieving at work. I realize I’m largely generalizing, and that this certainly isn’t true of all relationship dynamics and I’m sure there are plenty of men who feel unseen and unappreciated for the things they contribute to the relationship so it goes both ways… but yeah. I’ve seen Nate and Carissa’s dynamic before and I can tell you right now, I’ve never seen it lead to happy, peaceful, fulfilling relationships (and in many cases, the guy eventually meets someone else and leaves the family).